What is this conflict really about? What actually matters? And what doesn’t matter at all? If you feel cheated, it is very likely that you’re not seeing straight. You’ve lost sight of what really matters to you. You’re so disappointed, frustrated and furious, that you can only think of one thing:
retribution! But getting back at the other person won’t make you feel better. And it certainly won’t get you what you want. At best, he will lick his wounds for a while. At worst, you’ll have a full-blown escalation on your hands. At such times, stop and ask yourself: How do I want to remember this conflict? What will still seem important to me ten years down the road? Will I be proud of the way I handled it? In other words: Begin with the end in mind
We acknowledge Aernoud Bourdrez for his shared experiences.