• Q: What’s the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?
A: A bad lawyer can let a case drag for several years. A good lawyer can make it last even longer.
• Q: Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?
A: To practice.
Q: Why are there so many lawyers in the U.S.?
A: Because St. Patrick chased the snakes out of Ireland.
Lawyers are like rhinoceroses: thick skinned, short-sighted, and always ready to charge. –David Mellor